Wearing number 27, he hit a wispy .211 in his only season in Detroit with 14 home runs and 23 doubles — just one fewer than Magglio Ordonez hit last year.

He wasn’t a total loss for the Tigers though. He came to Detroit along with Aurelio Lopez and was traded (with Phil Mankowski) to the Mets for one my all-time favorites, Richie Hebner.

Most of his success came with the Cubs. In seven seasons he batted .275 with 59 homers … for some really bad teams.

¡Feliz cumpleaños, Julio!

1. If you were holding out hope that Timo Perez would be the answer to the Tigers’ left-handed hitting outfielder problem — I’m looking at you, Big Al — we have some disappointing news: Timo signed a minor-league deal with the Dodgers.
   

   Perez, 34, split the 2009 season between the independent Can-Am league’s New Jersey and Veracruz of the Mexican League.

   And here I thought he was still in Toledo.

2. First, let’s tip our cap to birthday boy Magglio Ordonez. With that out of the way, let’s compare Maggs to someone else who was born on this date in 1974: the ulcer-generating-Tigers-bully Jermaine Dye. If you had to guess, who would you say hit more home runs?

   If you said Magglio (as I did) you would be incorrect. In fact, Dye has hit 48 more home runs. Now, I soon remembered that Magglio missed most of 2004 (52 games) and half of ‘05 (82), and Dye has one more season under his belt. But when you look at their other career offensive stats, they’re darned comparable (with Ordonez ahead in all the other stats cherry-picked for this post):

   –>Average

   • Dye: .274
   • Ordonez: .312

     –>Hits

   • Dye: 1,779
   • Ordonez: 1,974

     –>RBI

   • Dye: 1,072
   • Ordonez: 1,145

     –>Doubles

   • Dye: 363
   • Ordonez: 399

     –>OPS

   • Dye: .826
   • Ordonez: .884

   Who knew? Oh, and Happy Birthday, Jermaine. May Opening Day 2010 find you in the Tigers dugout or in the National League.

3. On this date in 1992 the Tigers avoided salary arbitration with Cecil Fielder by agreeing to a $4.5 million contract. At the time, it was the largest one-year deal in major-league history. And soon Justin Verlander will blow right past that number.

• I attended the Tigers Winter Caravan one time, in 1991 when I was living in Kalamazoo and had some connections with the local paper. Back then, only the media was invited. Or so I thought. I walked into a Kalamazoo hotel and saw dozens of fans asking for autographs from the players and Sparky Anderson.

  If memory serves me, Cecil Fielder was there. Recently signed Tony Bernazard was too. This I remember because I asked Sparky during the Q&A how he’d work Bernazard into the lineup without Tony Phillips losing at bats. The answer was classic Sparky and basically amounted to: “I have no idea but Tony is Tony and we’ll be all right.” Uh, yeah. (Bernazard was released in April after playing in just six games and hitting .167).

  The real story that winter was the recent firing of Ernie Harwell and, lo and behold, new Tigers President Bo Schembechler was on hand to answer questions about it. As you might guess, Bo was not happy with the first round of reporters’ questions being about Ernie and not the team. After that, he said he wouldn’t answer other questions on the topic and though people tried, he wouldn’t bite — other than to bite their head off for even asking.

  It was a great experience. If you get an opportunity to attend a Winter Caravan event, do it.

• I tweeted about this yesterday, but I think it’s worth repeating: Dave Dombrowski insists that the Tigers have no interest in Johnny Damon. Fine. But he said the same thing about Ivan Rodriguez and Magglio Ordonez. Wouldn’t be surprised if Damon arrives in Lakeland in a few weeks.

• Speaking of moves, I don’t understand all the anger around the Jose Valverde signing. While he drove me nuts as the Diamondbacks’ closer a few years ago, that was mainly because of his antics after earning a save. Remember: no one could make sense of the Tigers signing Todd Jones and Kenny Rogers in the winter of 2005-06 but that worked out fine. Expect the same with Valverde.

• On this date in 1993, Tigers Hall of Fame second baseman Charlie Gehringer died at the age of 89, one month after suffering a stroke. During his 19-year career in Detroit, The Mechanical Man posted a .320 batting average with 184 home runs and 1,427 RBI. In 1937, he led the American League with a .371 average.

Finally, Happy Birthday to a pair of former Tigers: Wil Ledezma,29, and Tom Urbani, 42.

The Score: Tigers 5 – White Sox 3

The Gist: You couldn’t ask for more than Justin Verlander delivered on Sunday afternoon in the Tigers’ home finale of the as-yet-undecided 2009 season. Ryan Raburn went yard twice and the resurrected Magglio Ordonez went 4 for 4 to power most of the offense. Of course, it wouldn’t be a Tigers game without a wasted inning with a starter, this time John Danks, on the ropes. A win is a win, though this win would’ve been better on, say, Thursday.

The Quote: “I wasn’t sure right away I was going to get there.” – Curtis Granderson, referring to either his diving catch in the eighth which saved the game from looming disaster OR the Tuesday playoff game in Minnesota.

The Stat: 12 and 13 – The Tigers’ record this year on Tuesdays

Magic Digit: 1

Up Next: Tigers @ Twins – Tuesday, 5 p.m. ET on TBS

Rick Porcello (14-9. 4.04 ERA) vs. Scott Baker (15-9, 4.36)

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The Score: Tigers 6 – Twins 5

The Gist: Justin Verlander looked like a man on a mission but despite his terrific outing the Twins kept coming. And if it weren’t for Curtis Granderson’s homer in the eighth, the Tigers would’ve come to bat in the ninth inning of a tied game for the second time in 12 hours. Miguel Cabrera launched a bomb to open the scoring in the third and Magglio Ordonez had a key double to left — to left — later in the inning to give the Tigers a 3-0 lead.

The View: The Tigers are fortunate to go to bed with a two-game lead. If Joe Crede were healthy and playing for the Twins, I’m not sure that would be the case. Nevertheless, savor the split.

The Quote: “I don’t have anybody better than you.” — Jim Leyland to Verlander during an eighth-inning visit to the mound.

The Stat: 0 – The chances we’ll see Wilkin Ramirez on the field again this season.

Magic Number: 4

Up Next: Twins @ Tigers

Eddie Bonine (0-1, 4.60 ERA) vs. Carl Pavano (13-11, 4.86)

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The Gist: Two things returned to form on Monday night in Cleveland: Edwin Jackson (13-7) pitching deep into the game holding the Indians at bay, and the Tigers’ offense oversleeping as it usually does when Jackson starts. Ryan Raburn flashed leather and lumber with a homer (number 14) and a key assist, nailing Matt LaPorta at the plate. Magglio Ordonez went 3 for 3 raising his September average to .417 — !!

The Quote: “We got a good effort from our starting pitcher. We were one base hit away from that being a different ballgame. We were one play early from that being a different ballgame.” — Indians Manager Eric Wedge, reminding Tigers fans what they feared most as the game stayed 1-0 for too long.

The Stat: 6 – The number of first-pitch strikes Jackson made through the first seven innings, according to MLB.com’s Jason Beck on Twitter.

Magic Number: 10

Up Next: Tigers @ Indians

Rick Porcello (13-9, 4.22 ERA) vs. Justin Masterson (4-8, 4.49 ERA)

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Just can’t.

• In all the blather about Magglio Ordoñez’s $18-million option trigger, one thing people failed to note has been his remarkable durability over the life of the contract.

  Other than the first year of the deal, 2005, when his knee was still recovering and a sports hernia limited him to 82 games, Ordoñez has played in an average of 153 games — 94 percent. Fact is, the Tigers didn’t expect much of him in ‘05.

  This season he’s played in 120 of 149 games (81 percent) and if he plays in the remaining 13 games he’ll play in 82 percent.

  In all, not bad for a guy who the Tigers and their fans feared might not play more than one season — at best — in Detroit.

• Yahoo! Sports’ Jeff Passan sets his sights on Jim Leyland today:
  

  Leyland is a prisoner, and isn’t that the beauty and ugliness of being a manager: While he’s only as good as his players, they get to determine how his 2009 is viewed.

  If the Tigers win the AL Central by one game, he’s a genius, a puppeteer who took a ragamuffin team and brought it into October.

  And if the Tigers lose the Central by one game, he’s no different than those Mets and Phillies and Red Sox and Angels and Indians. A good-for-nothing choker.

• The Tigers are #10 in the ESPN Power Rankings this week. But really, who cares?

• On this date in 1935, the Tigers clinched the pennant with a doubleheader sweep of the St. Louis Browns. Tommy Bridges wins the opener while Elden Auker takes the nightcap with a complete-game shutout. The Tigers don’t exactly finish strong: they go 1-6 to end the season.

• In case you were wondering, on this date in 2006 the Tigers were a half-game up on the Twins. Makes today’s lead look better, doesn’t it?

Lastly, Happy Birthday to Cecil Fielder (46), the late Aurelio Lopez, Billy Muffett (79), the late (aforementioned) Elden Auker and the late John McHale, Sr. (88).

Have a great week.

Anyway, enjoy him, folks. He’ll be frustrating another team’s fans next year.

And now this:

• How well are things going for the Tigers? They at last moved into the top eight of The Sporting News‘ power poll (last week they were #10). Breaking through that barrier means the Tigers, at least for this week, aren’t a division-leader sitting behind better-rated, non-playoff teams. And maybe — maybe — Detroit is starting to gain some respect out there. TSN’s take:
  

  8. Tigers. The Tigers are finally starting to play like a team grabbing control of the division title instead of backing into the division title.

  Other polls: ESPN #7, last week #11; Fox Sports #9 (#10); SI #10 (#10); CBS SportsLine #11 (#13).

  On this morning’s ESPN Baseball Today podcast Peter Pascarelli gives the Tigers big props (he rates them #5 on his list) and he says he’d take Justin Verlander over Cliff Lee in a World Series matchup. On both points Eric Karabell disagrees — big time. Oh, and Karabell thinks the Rockies are a better club than Detroit. Pascarelli doesn’t buy that. Neither do I.

• Here are some notable Tigers historical nuggets from Baseball-Reference.com:
  • On this date in 1967, the Tigers moved into a first-place tie with the Twins. Eddie Mathews and Jim Northrup hit home runs and Mickey Lolich out dueled the White Sox’ Tommy John 4-1 at Chicago.

  • On Sept. 8, 1983, Yankees (and former Tigers) outfielder Steve Kemp was struck in the face by an Omar Moreno line drive during batting practice in Milwaukee; Kemp misses the rest of the season with a fractured cheekbone. Kemp hit just .242 with 12 home run and 49 RBI in the first year of his five-year, $5.45 million contract.

  • In 1995, the Tigers traded Juan Samuel to the Royals in exchange for a player to be named. A week later, the Royals sent Phil Hiatt to Detroit to complete the deal.

  • And on this date a year ago, Gary Sheffield hit a grand slam for the official 250,000th homer in MLB history. The blast is Sheffield’s second of the day and his 13th career grand slam. Magglio Ordonez, Miguel Cabrera and Mike Hessman also homer as the Tigers outslug the A’s 14-8. I was there for that game and, man, was it wet, cold and blustery.

If you’re a Twitter person, be sure to follow us and you’ll get Tigers birthdays, trivia and historical notes — all in a crisp 140 characters. Find us at @DailyFungo.

Celebrate Nate! I might be the only person in the Tigers Fan Universe looking forward to Robertson’s return to the rotation. Ian?

Today’s Walewanders are fueled by Almighty Blend coffee from Ann Arbor’s Mighty Good Coffee Roasting Co., sent along by the aforementioned Mr. Casselberry.

• Confession: When the Tigers lose, I don’t read the game stories, I don’t listen to The Baseball Today podcast, I don’t seek out game highlights. Frees up a lot of time and I recommend it.
• Today’s game marks the last time the Tigers face the Angels in the regular season. That means you’ll have to wait until next year to hear Rod Allen gush over Torii Hunter.
• While we wait for Aubrey Huff’s bat to arrive from Baltimore, let’s review the performance of Tigers players that have worn #19 this decade:
  • 2009: Huff, .083, one RBI
  • 2008-09: Jeff Larish, .242, 6 HR, 23 RBI
  • 2005: Exavier Prente Nook Logan, .264, 31 stolen bases
  • 2003-04: Alex Sanchez .304, 63 stolen bases
  • 2002: Worn by hitting coach (and Flint native) Merv Rettenmund
  • 2001: Roger Cedeno, .293, 11 triples, 55 stolen bases
  • 2000: Juan Gonzalez, .289, 22 HR, 67 RBI.
• Brandon Inge’s tattoos. Methinks he’ll regret that decision when he’s 65. If not sooner.
• I don’t care that Ramon Santiago and Adam Everett are hitting a combined .247. Give me their defense and occasional base hit (or homer, as Everett showed today) over Edgar Renteria.
• Two homers in Oakland or not, I don’t want to see Ryan Raburn batting third ever again. Ever.
• Enough of the Magglio Ordonez bashing already. The Tigers had to overpay players to come to Detroit in 2004 and ‘05 and this is the (steep) cost of doing business. Live and learn. Though, the overpaying of Dontrelle Willis makes one believe the “learn” part of the equation needs more attention.
• Speaking of The Baseball Today, on this morning’s episode, host Eric Karabell says he can’t see the Tigers beating the Yankees or Angels in first-round series. It’s beginning to sound a lot like 2006…
• Marcus Thames isn’t on the 2010 Tigers, is he?
• As for the postseason, I’m dreaming of a Tigers/Rockies World Series – my two favorite teams, baby. Well, Tigers/Dodgers would be sweet, too. In fact, even sweeter. Never mind.
• The Porcello/Youkilis Summit seems like a distant memory and for that we should all be thankful. Here are the results of our recent Fungo Pulse Check poll in which readers ranked the brawls. The question: Tale of the Tape: Which Tigers Brawl Ranks as Your Most Memorable?
  • 1982: Dave Rozema’s Kung-Foolery (37%, 10 Votes)
  • 2000: Sixteen Ejected at Comiskey (37%, 10 Votes)
  • 1980: Al Cowens’ Payback to Ed Farmer (19%, 5 Votes)
  • 2009: Porcello v. Youkilis (7%, 2 Votes)

  Reader Ed reminded me in the comments here about the fight in Kansas City (was it 2001?) in which Jeff Weaver plunked Mike Sweeney. That’s when we all realized how much Weav’s teammates loved him…very little.

Finally, Happy 45th Birthday to Chad Kreuter — who also wore #19 (and hit .263 for Detroit from 1992 through ‘94).

Interestingly enough, almost as many votes came in for “Neither” (35 percent, 9 votes) as votes for Halladay. Personally, I’d like to see Rockies’ rightfielder Brad Hawpe in a Tigers uniform but with the Rockies hanging around the N.L. Wild Card race he’s going nowhere.

The Tigers should go after the A’s Holliday but only if they can sign him to a reasonable extension — if for no other reason than to see what a “reasonable extension” looks like from the Tigers.

In other news…

• With Joel Zumaya back on the shelf, don’t the Tigers have to at least consider making him a starter? If we’ve learned nothing else, we now see that he’s not built for the late-innings role but might excel in the rotation — think “marathon versus sprint.” Also, if the Tigers have a young Ryan Perry waiting in the wings, why not try to extend Zumaya’s career? What do you think? Take our latest poll –>

• Great to see Magglio Ordonez go yard with a grand slam last night. Still, it was an off-speed pitch. No chance he gets around on a Joe Nathan fastball, though.

• A report here in the Arizona Republic says the preliminary Interleague schedule for next season has the Diamondbacks visiting the Tigers. Enough with the Interleague already.

• On this date in 2005 the Tigers acquired infielder John McDonald for a player to be named later. If you recall, that player was John McDonald.

Finally, in case you were wondering, 25 years ago the Tigers were 66-29 and had a nine-game lead over Toronto in the American League East. On July 22, 1984, the Tigers beat the Rangers 2-0 at Tiger Stadium behind Dan Petry’s 8-2/3 innings of four-hit ball. Sparky lifted him with two outs in the ninth with lefty Pete O’Brien coming to the plate with the tying run on base. Willie Hernandez came in and got O’Brien to pop out on the first pitch. (And the game lasted only two hours, 11 minutes. Imagine.)

• Despite MLB’s efforts, I realized that I still hadn’t cast my All-Star ballot. Voting ends tomorrow night, so vote late and often.

• As we watch Magglio Ordonez’s swing atrophy, I’m thinking that he might personify the 2008 Tigers team. That is, we all kept thinking that this game or this series would be the one that got Detroit on the path to its rightful place in the postseason. And we waited and waited… Now it’s Maybe this at bat will get Maggs going…. Alas, it ain’t looking good.

• Speaking of Ordonez, in the recent Fungo Pulse Check poll, only one voter out of 36 would choose to release him over Dontrelle Willis (53 percent) or Nate Robertson (44 percent). Tigers fans sure love their Magglio. [Take our latest poll -->]

• My fandom for (of?) Nate Robertson is well documented here. Over the past two seasons I think I’ve been tainted by Ian’s anti-Nate sentiment and find myself — at best — Nate Neutral. But, ever the quasi-optimist, I’m wondering if this week’s elbow surgery could inject some zip into the left wing. What do you think?

• Speaking of being a fan boy, last week I was out of town and without my MLB Extra Innings package — thus, no Tigers games on TV. I have to say, the Tigers blogosphere can make a guy feel right at home. BlessYouBoys.com and MackAvenueTigers.com alone made it so I didn’t miss a beat.

Finally, on this date in 1915 right-hander Cletus Elwood “Boots” Poffenberger was born in Williamsport, Md. Ol’ Boots pitched two of his three big-league seasons, 1937 and ‘38, for the Tigers posting a 16-12 record and a 4.75 ERA. He died in 1999 in Williamsport, Va. A search of Google Maps doesn’t bring up a Williamsport, Va., but it does show Williamsport, Md., where he was born, which is across the Potomac River from West Virginia — but there’s no Williamsport, W. Va.

If you’re still reading at this point, bless you.

• It’s a shame that I read the USA Today only when I’m traveling, as I am today. There’s usually one or two outstanding pieces in each edition and this morning proved it: a feature on the Tigers by Bob Nightengale.

• Juan Rincon, a victim of a roster numbers game last month — we’re looking at you, Nate Robertson, has been recalled by the Rockies from Triple-A Colorado Springs. Embrace the humidor, Senor. (Oh, and now that the Rox have run off a late-2007-like streak recently, do we all feel a tad better about them taking two of three from the Tigers? Didn’t think so.)

• He might not chuck it as hard as Ryan Perry, but it’s close enough and I, for one, am glad Freddy Dolsi’s back.

• Did you happen to catch this nastygram from Ken Rosenthal about the Tigers benching Magglio Ordonez? The zingers about Gary Sheffield are amusing but I don’t think anyone in the Tigers front office regrets the decision to cut him loose. And for what it’s worth, I hope that Ordonez finds his stroke soon and that he doesn’t wind up on the Red Sox, poking homers over The Green Monster at Fenway.

• Speaking of hitters, here are the results of our most recent Fungo Pulse Check poll. The question: Which of These Sluggers Should the Tigers Go After?
  • Matt Holliday: 35% (12 votes)
  • Brad Hawpe: 32% (11 votes)
  • Adam Dunn: 29% (10 votes)
  • Jeff Francouer: 3% (1 vote)
  • Carlos Lee: bupkis

  Be sure to vote in our new poll, available in the sidebar –>

• Finally, I didn’t weigh in on the Jim Leyland extension when it happened: I believe it came a few weeks too late, but I’m delighted that he re-upped. I don’t want to see the Tigers become the Verizon Wireless of Major League Baseball, with a new manager every two years or so. (If anyone should’ve been shown the door as a result of this clunky roster, it should’ve been [should be?] Dave Dombrowski.)

Have a great week.

• 7-5, Tied for 1st Place in A.L. Central with Chicago and Kansas City
• Streak: W2
• Home Record: 4-1
• Road Record: 3-4

Streaks:

• Last 10 Games: 7-3
• Last 5 Games: 3-2

Who’s Hot from the Past Week:

• Josh Anderson: .545 avg., .615 OBP, .818 SLG, 4 RBI, 2 SB
• Miguel Cabrera: .455 avg., .478 OBP, .591 SLG, 10 H, 1 HR, 2 RBI
• Gerald Laird: .400 avg., .500 OBP, .400 SLG
• Magglio Ordonez: .353 avg., .522 OBP, .353 SLG

Who’s Not:

• Carlos Guillen: .190 avg., .261 OBP, .190 SLG
• Placido Polanco: .182 avg., .250 OBP, .364 SLG
• Curtis Granderson: .174 avg., .240 OBP, .174 SLG

Up Next: Angels

• Today: Off Day
• Tuesday: Armando Galarraga (2-0, 0.68) vs. RHP Jered Weaver (1-1, 3.09)
• Wednesday: Justin Verlander (0-2, 7.88) vs. LHP Joe Saunders (2-1, 2.18)
• Thursday: Edwin Jackson (1-0, 2.14) vs RHP Dustin Moseley (1-0, 4.30)

Tigers vs. Angels

• All-Time Record: 297-275
• All-Time at Los Angeles: 137-150
• All-Time at Detroit: 160-125
• All-time at Comerica Park: 14-23

• Height: 6′ 0″ | Weight: 215
• 2008 Stats: .317 – 21 HR – 103 RBI

Few hitters can weather a 50-point drop in batting average and still be within shouting distance of a batting crown. But that’s how 2008 shaped up for Tigers rightfielder Magglio Ordoñez. The 2007 A.L. batting champ served up an encore performance in ’08: .317, fifth in the league, 22 home runs and 103 RBI. Certainly, having Miguel Cabrera batting ahead of him helped Ordoñez see more strikes in ’08, but since joining Detroit in 2005 all he’s done is hit.

Last season, Ordoñez fluctuated from month to month – .296 in April, .350 in May; .266 in June, .386 in July – but finished the season strong, batting .330 in the second half and mounting a credible defense of his batting title.

Ordoñez is a top-tier hitter thanks to a stroke that can deftly handle pitches across the strike zone, but the closer the pitch is to the inner-half of the plate the better. Like most power hitters, he can crush a fastball but he takes more delight in change-ups from righties – a .407 average when he hits one – and curves from southpaws, an astounding .600 clip.

At 35, Ordoñez shows no sign of slowing and looks at home as the Tigers’ cleanup hitter. And that should worry A.L. pitchers – again – in 2009.

Without further ado, here are the first Non Sequiturs of the 2009 season powered, as usual, by a fresh pot of Peet’s Coffee:

• We have our first box score of 2009 for the Tigers. Enjoy it in all its linear glory.

• Did you catch the MLB Network’s “30 Clubs in 30 Days” program focused on the Tigers on Monday? (If you missed, catch it here.) I caught the West Coast replay and, like so many things related to the fledgling network, I was underwhelmed. I enjoyed the interviews, seeing Gary Sheffield’s beard, watching Al Kaline say absolutely nothing interesting, etc., but if you’ve followed the Tigers even in the most casual way this offseason, chances are you learned nothing new.

  
  But, in the spirit of a positive mental outlook, I determined that these shows likely aren’t produced for the hardcore Tigers fan. They’re for everyone else. If I watch the episode on, say, the Marlins, I’ll probably learn a lot. In the end, the show was worth watching for these three nuggets:

  • Mitch Williams picking the Tigers to win the division.

  • Dan Plesac picking the Tigers again to finish last (this after raving about how great a manager Jim Leyland is).
  • Plesac somewhat butchering a nice attempt at complimenting Ernie Harwell’s “he stood there like the house by the side of the road and watched that one go by.”

• Not that you care, but I’m booked for three Cactus League games next week in metro-Phoenix and in Tucson. Fungophile John Milton and our friend Steve will be coming to Arizona for games Friday (Indians/Brewers), Saturday (Giants/Rockies) and Sunday (Rockies/Padres).

  The Friday game is of interest mainly because it will be at the Indians’ new Spring Training facility in the middle of nowhere also known as Goodyear, Ariz. We also wanted to attend that game because, let’s face it, seeing the Indians 19 times against the Tigers this summer just isn’t going to be enough. Of course, the Saturday game will give us one more chance to boo Edgar Renteria at close range.

• Be sure you add Ian Casselberry’s Morning Prowl at BlessYouBoys.com to your daily reading agenda. Ian reads it all, summarizes it neatly and we’re all the better for it. Now if only he’d do the same for The New York Times and ESPN.com…

• Happy 45th birthday to once-heralded Tigers catcher-o’-the-future Rich Rowland. After four partial season and 83 at bats with Detroit, he was dealt to the Red Sox for John Flaherty on April 1, 1994.

Finally, I stumbled on this gem from The Onion. It’s from 2007 but it’s still funny and, very likely, still relevant. Here’s the lede:

Following their game against the Twins Tuesday, Tigers outfielder Magglio Ordonez and second baseman Placido Polanco stayed in their hotel room all night, giddily discussing their favorite in-game hitting situations.

• I wonder what was going through Tigers’ owner Mike Ilitch head today when Lynn Henning of the News asked him about the team’s off season progress — at a press conference in which Ilitch was committing $72 million to Henrik Zetterberg.

• Remember all the panic from 2006 and 2007 as the Tigers dealt away blue-chip pitching talent? Things are already looking up.

• I was about to crack wise about poor Nationals fans who will be subjected to Rob Dibble as the new television analyst on MASN broadcasts. Then I realized Tigers fans have a problem of their own alongside Dan Dickerson in the radio booth.

• I’m with Ian: Timo Time es muy bueno.

Finally, Yahoo! Sports’s Tim Brown recently pitched in his two cents on the 2009 Tigers in his Hot Stove Daily column.

So, here I am working on a — gasp! — PC trying to get some stuff done. (There’s more on my Windows Vista experience here.) I offer this not as a self-handicapping thing, but as a legit reason. Honest.

On with the Fungoes:

• There’s been much to talk about in recent weeks and it centers on an infuriating lack of activity by the Tigers. Kerry Wood? Gone — to the Indians. Carl Pavano? Gone…to the Indians. Jason Giambi? Gone. Brian Fuentes? John Smoltz? Trevor Hoffman? Gone. Gone. Gone. What’s worse is that these guys, for the most part, were considered low-cost, low-risk investments for the teams they joined. Are the Tigers suddenly so cash poor/talent rich that they can’t take a flyer on the likes of Giambi — a solid lefty bat — or Pavano who could actually be an upgrade over Nate Robertson and Dontrelle Willis? I would love to know what the master plan is down on Witherell.

• The Padres pick Virgil Vasquez off waivers today from the Red Sox. Let’s hope Double-V gets some appearances in San Diego who will definitely need help when Jake Peavy gets dealt.

• There’s nothing like some distance from the past baseball season to provide some perspective on how good or bad a player was. Two examples in each category from the 2008 Tigers:
  • The Good: Magglio Ordonez – .317, 21 HR, 103 RBI for the season but he hit .330 in the second half.
  • The Bad: Gary Sheffield – .225, 19 HR, 57 RBI. He hit a meager .217 in the first half and .232 in the second. Yeah, I know, he wasn’t completely healthy but still, if it weren’t for his 500th homer chase, Sheff would’ve been persona non grata at Comerica Park in 2008.

• Perhaps you heard that former Tigers pitcher Dave Roberts passed away today at 64. He was acquired by the Tigers on Dec. 6, 1975 when the Astros traded him along with Jim Crawford and Milt May to Detroit for Leon Roberts, Terry Humphrey, Gene Pentz, and Mark Lemongello. Roberts appeared in 48 games for the Tigers in 1976 and ‘77 — all of them starts. In 1976, he posted a record of 16-17 and a 4.00 ERA with 18 complete games. The following year he made 22 starts for the Tigers going 4-10, 5.15, before his contract was purchased by the Cubs on July 30. According to the MLB.com story, Roberts died from lung cancer.
  

  Roberts’ death came after a struggle with lung cancer that had developed from exposure to asbestos — a mineral with toxic fibers — earlier in his life, according to a report by the Associated Press. He had worked as a boilermaker years ago, which likely exposed him to the toxic substance.

  How things have changed. You certainly don’t hear of any journeyman lefty relievers working as boilermakers in the off season anymore just to make ends meet. Today Roberts would be making $4 million a year.

Finally, Happy Birthday today to Freddy Dolsi, 26; Ivan DeJesus – what? You didn’t know he played for the Tigers? He did: 1988 – and Phil Mankowski, both 56.

At long last, the Tigers appeared to have developed a left-handed power-ish hitter who could take over one of the corner outfield slots perhaps as soon as 2009.

But, when Jim Leyland announced that left field would be Carlos Guillen’s position next season and when it became more apparent that Magglio Ordonez was going nowhere this offseason, Joyce’s role went from promising to fuzzy — at best.

Nevertheless, Joyce was a sign of progress in the Tigers’ farm system beyond pitching depth and maybe a budding star.

Until he wasn’t…at least in Detroit.

Three weeks ago he was dealt to his hometown of Tampa Bay for pitcher Edwin Jackson. From what we’ve read, the acquisition of Jackson will be a winning one for the Tigers. And in the end maybe it will be.

Still, it would be nice to see a young position player develop into a star — or something close to it — wearing the old English D.

The Score: Royals 7 – Tigers 3

The Gist: The Tigers got off to a fast start but the Royals decided not to lose their eighth straight on Sunday and scored seven unanswered runs off Tigers starter Kenny Rogers. Recently banished Nate Robertson pitched two-thirds of scoreless, hitless relief (huzzah!). Placido Polanco had three hits and two RBI and took a five-point edge over Magglio Ordonez for the team batting lead.

The Quote: “What should have been a good game for us turned into a not-so good game.” – Jim Leyland

The Stat: 8. The number of games under .500 that Rogers, Justin Verlander, Jeremy Bonderman and Robertson find themselves. In contrast, Armando Galarraga is eight games over. Ugliness.

Up Next: Indians @ Tigers:

• Monday: Armando Galarraga (12-4, 3.17) vs. Zach Jackson (0-0, 5.17)
• Tuesday: Chris Lambert (0-0, -.–) vs. Cliff Lee (18-2, 2.43)
• Wednesday: Justin Verlander (10-13, 4.42) vs. Fausto Carmona (6-5, 4.40)

Here we are, approaching the third weekend of August, and the Tigers are mired in third place, nine-and-a-half games out of first place. And, as I’m always reminding myself, only five games out of last place. This was supposed to be like 1984, 1968 or even 1945. It was not supposed to be like – gulp – 2005.

The Tigers record coming into this weekend series against the Orioles is 59-62. Entering play on Aug. 14, 2005, the Tigers were 53-61, 21-and-a-half-games out of first.

While the 2005 club was further back in the standings mathematically on Aug. 14, the current team feels about that far behind the White Sox and Twins. Doesn’t it?

Three years ago, Tigers fans seemed more interested in whether or not Alan Trammell would return as manager, who they’d acquire in the offseason, and what on God’s green earth to do with Carlos Pena?

Today, well, the team has probably more questions than the 2005 team did. One thing we can be assured of is Jim Leyland returning as manager. And that’s a good thing. Of course, some may disagree with that, but I believe there are very few buttons he could’ve pushed this year that would make up almost 10 games in the standings.

Here are 17 questions about the 2009 season rattling around in my head:

1. Who’s the closer in 2009?
2. Does Chuck Hernandez return as pitching coach?
3. Is Nate Robertson a Tiger next season?
4. Can Dontrelle Willis bounce back?
5. Can the Tigers deal Carlos Guillen?
6. If the Tigers can get a catcher, do they — and do they move Brandon Inge back to third?
7. Does Vance Wilson return at long last?
8. Who’s the shortstop?
9. Would they deal Magglio Ordonez as some suggest?
10. How does Jeremy Bonderman recover?
11. Is Clete Thomas on the big club to stay?
12. Who is 2009’s Matt Joyce?
13. Are the Tigers counting on Freddy Garcia?
14. Will Brent Clevlen finally break through?
15. What can the Tigers expect out of Joel Zumaya?
16. Do they sign Placido Polanco to an extension before the season?
17. What’s Gary Sheffield’s role — if any?

Ultimately, the 2005 Tigers finished 20 games under .500. Will this year’s team finish that far off the pace? Some days (i.e., against Tampa Bay) it certainly feels as if they could, but I doubt it.

I’m tending to believe that Doug’s right — 81 and 81 for this year’s club. But the fate of the 2009 team lies in how they address the pressing issues hovering over the organization.