“This ain’t what Jim thought he was getting.”

That’s a quote from John Rawlings‘ article today on The Sporting News.com. If you’re looking for some objective, albeit sobering, perspective on the Tigers, your search is over:

The Tigers traded for Cabrera over the winter and then signed him to a contract through 2015 knowing he is “a horrible, horrible” third baseman, according to a scout. “He is the worst in baseball, and it’s not close. And the bigger he gets, the less he can move.”

There’s lots more negativity — reality? — in the piece, if you’re interested. Such as:

Guillen was switched from shortstop to first base this season because he is injury-prone and, at 32, his range had decreased. “He turned out to be a butcher at first, and that surprised me,” a scout says. Guillen played third early in his career (100 games) and was adequate.

Because third base is more demanding than first, the Tigers are exposing Guillen to more stress on his legs. He lost time to injuries in eight consecutive seasons before playing more than 150 games in 2006 and 2007.

Oh, we’re nothing if not optimistic here at the Fungo. In fact, we don’t even own a panic button.

Still, don’t you feel that all this Tigers piling-on smells like nationwide schadenfreude?

Discuss.